Tuesday, July 7, 2009

I've been crying all day... that must be why we have so many watermelons

I swear to you, I said those actual words... out loud... today..

But here's the thing, I was saying it literally, not a joke. A sentence that tickles my funny bone in just the right way it's almost cosmic- sounding more like a mad lib than the truth, but there it is. The truth really is stranger than fiction.

I was having one of those really bad days, where your eyeballs just sweat continually from the moment that you wake up. I had myself a nice little anxiety attack last night and didn't get to sleep till about 4 am. So, basically, I was just one big mess today.

Since the birth of my son, I have cut ties with all of my unhealthy relationships/friendships and I've found, sadly, that there were very few REAL friends left. I feel more than lucky to have made at least a few good solid choices in the friendship arena. And despite my new found social psychosis, I've made a couple of new friends too.

I've made 3 new friends, two men and one woman. The woman and one of the men are a couple and are the proprietors of the little store on the corner of my street. They are magickal wonderful neighbors and have always shown my Harley such tenderness, joy and patience it makes my heart full and my eyes water...(again) They are the Lawrence's, Janie and Israel. The Lawrence's have closed up shop since sometime last year. In fact I think it's coming up on a year the store has been closed. However, Mr. Lawrence comes up to check on the store, pick up the litter, trim the grass and etc. He will usually stop over, but he is kind of shy about coming to the door. If I don't see him pull up, he will go and try another time. He never comes empty handed either. He always leaves a melon or some oranges or Cheetos for Harley. (Cheetos are his favorite!) I believe the Lawrence's miss ole Harley. We saw them every day for over 2 years walking to and from the post office. And although they are not too much older than I am, their presence in my life has always been a comfort, like family elders. I miss them a lot. I miss them being a part of our everyday routine.

The other man, is Bethel Ransom. He is a kind kind man, and funny too. He usually makes me laugh about something or other. He is a local farmer. He works in the fields alongside others and transports his wares (fruits and veggies) to various locations, which thankfully include our house... an unscheduled stop! He sometimes does a little roadside selling out of his truck, but he hasn't been doing that too much this summer. If I don't see him by the roadside in a while, I know he'll be stopping by soon. Sometimes just to say hi. He always has a "little something" for us. Sometimes he visits when we aren't home. And we know this because.... he leaves his calling card. A melon, some greens (and I mean fresh greens with dirt still on them!) or some other tasty seasonal treat.

This will tie together, I promise. Ok so, I'm on the phone, bawling to my mother about my woes, when up drives Mr. Ransom. I was outside on the porch at the time, talking and smoking or I probably would not have known he was there. So, I get off the phone tp greet him. --I think my eyes stayed dry for about 2 seconds. I just could not hold back the torrent. I normally hate seeing people in that condition, even friends, but I couldn't very well ignore him either. So I smiled and tried to wing it. I ended up bawling on his shoulder. And in return, he gave me some good insights, a hug, a map to the local au pair's place, and of course, a melon... on the house. How great is he? Pretty great.

Ok so, my hub and Harley come home a few hours later and announce that there are two more melons sitting on my Jeep! I'm sure this must have been Israel. How crazy is that? Do they have the friend having a bad day radar turned up or does bad news travel fast in our fare town? Either way, we are blessed and it made us giggle. Harley and the hub saw the two melons on their way in from adventures and Harley came in screaming "MOM!! MOM!! MR. RANSOM'S BEEN HERE!! THE MELONS ARE ON YOUR CAR!!!!" (This is more exciting than the tooth fairy.)

I am now thinking silly thoughts like "Oh, cry me a river... of watermelons.... Watermelons a go-go... again?..... Damn Harley could eat his weight in watermelons, and then some!... We each get a watermelon all to ourselves! None of it makes no sense at all, but now a smile is on my face, a warm fuzzy in my cockles and I do feel better.

And I swear, its all true, can you beat that?!


Steph said...

Why crying to your mom? Why the au pair?

I love that watermelons cheer you up, or rather, friends who bring watermelons and such.

Petit fleur said...

Hey Steph,

Well, it was just so over the top is all... I mean 3 in one day!

Crying to my mom because I honestly just wanted to hear her voice and be reassured about some stuff. That and because my 2 friends were not home at the time!

To answer your questions about the au pair... I have to return to work in a rather hasty fashion it seems, and we had not planned on that at this point. I am sad about it and quite frankly unprepared. I trust very very few people with my Harley. I'm just paranoid that way. I don't want to think I can trust, have to KNOW. As much as it's humanly possible to know. Does that make sense?
Thanks for stoppin.

Steph said...

I'm sorry about going back to work. Gimme a holler if you need to, I been there.

Ms. Moon said...

And this is why we love Lloyd. And this is why people love Petit Fleur. And I got a watermelon out of it! Thank-you, darling.
Watermelon blessings. Tears are water, so are melons. Tears are salty, melons are sweet.
And you are sweetness, even when you cry.

Petit fleur said...

You are poetic even when you aren't making poems. Thank you. It almost made me cry again. The good kind.

And, thank you for talking me down. I wanted to mention that, but I decided that's another post for another day... You know I can ramble!

Lady Lemon said...

Oh, PF. I've totally had those days, too. It sucks that you are going to have to go to work. I am sure that you will find someone that you feel confortable leaving your baby with eventually. It'll all work out.

And it sounds like you have some really sweet people in your life looking after you. That really does mean so much when you are havng one of those days, doesn't it?

And hey! You know there is some vodka thing you can do with an extra melon? You poke a hole in it and pour a bottle of vodka in and then stick it in the freezer. Supposed to be great!

Love and hugs!

Petit fleur said...

It is... That and screwdrivers was the first thing I ever got stinking drunk on... I puked on my date's shoes!

The melon was great though! He had it in a cooler in his trunk and we'd just grab hand fulls of it... ah high school. Anyway, I think there may be half a melon dedicated to the cause, thanks for the reminder.

I'm feeling so much better even though not a whole lot has changed. I'm pretty sure my hormones are starting to change yet again and that certainly makes it seem like the sky is falling.

Thanks again for checking in.
Here's to a great weekend!
xo pf

May said...

Oh Petite Fleur! What a day! I'm glad you're feeling better now but I'm sorry you had one of those emotional days. I do love the watermelon gifts though. Isn't it funny how the universe really takes care of us when we need it most?
Great post, by the way!

Petit fleur said...

Hey May!

I always feel special when I see that you've peeked in on me.

I think I just needed to unload for a day, and I DID! I really did, and I haven't in so long that I feel great now. So, come out here and git you some melon girly girl...

Spiral Dancer said...

Sounds like good old fashioned people there..sorry to hear you are having probs..if I was there I would take care of him x nanny an all that :)

Petit fleur said...

Oh what I wouldn't give for a great nanny and to be able to afford one... but then if we could afford one, we probably wouldn't need one! Life is one conundrum after the next. Thank you for sending love.

Hey did you get my message? I can't put comments up on your site since you changed your settings, so I left you a message here... It's a couple of posts down. Just in case you didn't. Here it is again.

Dear SD

Starhawk, who is a pretty renowned author, teacher and earth activist round these parts is participating in a festival in your area. On her blog, she writes:

* "I’m on a plane in an hour to fly to England, where I’ll be doing some workshops for the Transition Movement, teaching an Earth Activist Training and going to the Glastonbury Goddess festival. And doing my best to keep on blogging!"

I hope that you are able to go to this... it may be just the kind of thing to cheer you and inspire you! I wish so much that I could be there too... Someday.
I hope you read this! Peace pf

Human Wrecking Ball said...

Ain't no crime in cryin. As for the fake friends, I have shaken off a few ramora in my time too. I noticed the swim is more enjoyable. A few real freinds is more than most have, plus you have good produce delivered. Seems like a lot of people have the blues. Maybe it will pass us all by like a bad storm.
Heres hoping.

Petit fleur said...

Hey you!

Thanks for dropping in. I haven't had much time for anything. Hub is out of town and just got back yesterday. Single parenthood SUCKS! So, I will be visiting you again soon I hope. I'm supposed to be folding laundry now.

Thanks for the cyber support. I know you are right, it just takes a lot of getting used to when the chips are down... and they do go down. Funny thing is, they are already on their way back up! Life is strange.
Talk soon,

Zengoof said...

sweet as a melon, you are.

Petit fleur said...


Identify with Dexter said...

You are so creative. I love the watermelon blog, as well as many others. I don't know how you would break into the writing scene either, but it would be a crying-watermelon-shame if your zest and words didn't make it past our blogging eyes!

Petit fleur said...


I am truly amazed and delighted that someone likes my writing enough to say the encouraging things you do. Thank you.

See you at your place. I finally have a moment to read your new post!! yippie!