This is worthy of hiring a babysitter. I'm so there!
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
I'm always blaming things on Mercury being in retro, and this time, apparently, I am correct. I just got confirmation from Ms Moon, via Kati that yes indeedy, Merc is in retro. UGH! I KNEW IT! And I find it ever so much more irritating and unfair that this is happening when it is so damn hot hot HOT! This is when people snap and commit crimes of passion or just plain temporary insanity or whatever. Their blood boils, they are likely oxygen deprived from all the damn humidity and suddenly just can't take one more bit of madness and just explode in some kind of volcanic rage. This is also one of the key reasons that I believe that everyone who wants to purchase fire arms should HAVE to pass a psychological test and be background checked. At least south of the Mason Dixon anyway.
If you are sickened by poop talk or are faint of heart or easily grossed out, then you need to STOP reading at this point. You really really do.
Now then, you have been warned. If you are still with me, just take a deep breath and be glad you were not me on Monday 8-15-11.
I had "one of THOSE days" a few days ago. I wanted to write it out immediately to express some of my frustration and angst while it was still raging, but I was so wrong, I couldn't relive it till I'd settled down some. I just cold not. The reverberations of whatever strange karma I had going are still hanging around because some twerpy hippie wannabe kid tried to charge me a fucking dollar for a glass of water in a locally owned cafe which I frequent often and spend LOTS of my freaking money on Popsicles and coffee and just what ever. I let him have it. And he deserved it. I will talk with said owner and if things do not change I will NOT be back there. Period. But that was yesterday and just a residual wave. The real crazy happened the day before and while a lot of it, is riotously funny, it was also so damn frustrating to have to keep on "taking it" like a donkey in a hailstorm.
It all started out when I slid on some sick bunny poo... (I should have known right then and there what kind of day it was going to be, but I troopered ahead as we all do) You have to understand that sick bunny poo smells every bit as bad as dog poo, but is different in that it is extremely sticky~ Seriously. Ever after scraping it, I had to really work to get it all the way off! Like with mad amounts of soap and a nail brush! I frustratingly scraped some of the hard stuff off the floor with my fingernail and a paper towel.... It took me most of the day to get the smell off of my finger. GEEZ!!! Really?
Ok, so that began my day. Then it just went on from there, poop being the central theme. Not the bunny poop, but my son's poop. Sigh. Ok, so in honor of back story, my son has had gastro probs practically since birth and nobody can figure it out or offer any remedy that actually works, so he is going to a special clinic where they get to the bottom of these kinds of things. They needed a poop sample because although we have done this particular test several times in the past, they were running a few different tests that were not run the first two times. Have I mentioned I ABHOR this process? Well, I do. It is unsavory and messy and just a pain in the butt for all concerned. Pun intended. Ok, so I've been putting off collecting the poop for months now and our appt. is coming up early in Sept, so when Harley declared that he had to go potty, I asked, poop, or just pee pee? He replied that he was not sure yet. So.... this usually means that yes, he does have poo also. So we got all the peeing over with before attempting to poo. Thank the Gods that this special clinic has this process DOWN! Instead of giving you a couple of small jars with which to put the poop in and leaving you to your own devises to catch the poop, they actually give you a tupperware bucket with a little contraption to put under the seat to keep in in place on the potty! Woo hoo! I LOVE THIS FEATURE! Of course it has written in large blue letters "BIOHAZARD", so that is kind of funny to be running around town with, but I can easily live with that comedic part of the show. So, we were successful on the FIRST try catching the poo! Glory be and hallelujah! That began the journey of the biohazard poo. This is when things turn strange...
To be continued....
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Big boy, excited about a new book...
( I love that my kid gets excited about books.... God love him!)
As you can see, my baby has become quite the little man. A real boy! He is such a special critter, as all wee ones are. My wish is that all parents appreciate their children as we do Harley. Harley is not his real name, it is his blog name. I don't like to give too many details online because of an icky person in my past. But suffice to say, that Harley, aka Gman is indeed growing up in his own unique way.
On today's menu was a special form of mommy agony. He just started summer camp. (I know, a little late for that)... but... anyway, we thought it would be good to get him a little acclimated to his new school and some of the kids and teachers he'll be seeing regularly. It has mostly been a good thing, but he still has a bit of the separation sads. He did great yesterday, but today was just a little bumpy again.
He was waiting outside for his teacher, Mr. Louis to come back. Mr. Louis was getting his glasses, then they were going to set up for movie day. Gman seemed fine, so I kissed and hugged him goodbye and noticed his eyes were turning red and moist... But he bravely said good bye, so I began walking... hoping if I didn't make a big deal of it, he would become distracted and drawn into the goings on around him. But I couldn't help it, I had to look back. There he was with tears welling, but not a full on cry. I walked back and said why are you sad? He said, "I'm just used to you now". I said, that's ok. You will soon get used to all your friends here and your teachers and it will be easier to say goodbye. He said: "I know, it's ok". Then out came Mr. Louis and another dear child who called to him: "C'mon G-man, let's go!"
Then I get one last "Goodbye Mom, I love you!"
"I love you too Gman, see you at 2:30!"
Sigh. It's so big to me, that he is learning to not only express his emotions, but acknowledge them and regulate them... and use them to his advantage rather than his detriment. He clearly knew he was sad, but that it was also ok and would pass. Then we both sort helped sooth his sads a bit... but I feel certain, he didn't need me for that, although it was wanted and appreciated. "He's a fine boy" as our neighbor Israel used to say... And I'm certain he's going to be a fine man one day as well.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Harley and I are listening to a lot of swing music lately. My dad and my uncles used to play it, and play it well. They grew up with it and so did I. It's really hard to be worried or sad or upset or anything icky when you are listening to Benny goodman or Glen Miller. It really is hard to feel anything but good and breezy and happy.
I've been thinking a lot about this, and I really think that this music should be played at the start of all meetings. Middle East peace talks, in congress (perhaps in place of the pledge of allegiance, or maybe afterward). At the beginning of school days on the loud speaker after announcements, what have you. I think it would create a mood of general buoyancy and lend itself to the spirit of cooperation and the willingness to acknowledge one another as humans and not objects.
If I had lots of money, I would start a supper club. I would require proper dress, jackets, no hats, and etc... and I would employ a swing band for dining and dancing. It would be totally retro, like stepping into a time warp. Well, except for hair and fashion I suppose. Swing music and lyrics are uplifting with a certain magical quality...and it is my belief that when we are uplifted then we are in our highest state and we do better for ourselves and our communities. Not to mention, it's just fun to have a reason to dress up and do something a little different.
That's all I have this soggy Sunday.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Most of you, my dear itsy bitsy exceptionally groovy cult following know that my nephew was recently in a horrible car accident. The result of which makes me more than ever want to have a disintigrater gun so I can rid the world of texting drivers.
Matt continues to improve, albeit ever so slowly. He is now opening his eyes more frequently, but cannot see or speak. (He has a trach, so that explains the not speaking) He does move his mouth and tries to speak, but as long as he has the trach, I'm pretty sure that won't be a possibility. He can hear and follows his families voices. My niece, who is Matt's best friend, is also a trained singer. She sings to him often. He prefers the slower songs and will fix his eyes in her direction when she is singing. When she sings songs with a faster rhythm, he turns away, obviously wanting to be soothed and not entertained. He will need the back surgery as his spine is messed up. The good news is that there is only a little swelling on the actual spinal chord. They will do the back surgery next week sometime. (Any prayers, good thoughts and well wishes are welcome!)
The other good thing he does is he can do certain commands, which lets us know he can understand and respond to what is being asked of him... Jesus, all I can think of when I hear this is that Alfred Hitchcock episode... you know the one, where a guy is pronounced dead, but he is just paralyzed. You can hear his thoughts as he's figuring out that nobody knows he's alive and at the end he manages to move his pinkie finger. Ugh! Anyway, he is following simple commands: "Close your mouth" , "blink twice", etc.... and he does have feelings in his legs, so Team Matt is very pleased with all of this progress. I am a little concerned that he is unable to see and wondering if this will be permanent, but in the scheme of things, there is much more good than bad. So YAY!?
On to Harleyisms:
While playing a computer game he says: "Observe the master at work!"
Did I mention that he wants to use my beads to make the astroid belt in his room. (Ms Moon's lovely Lily and Owen gave him hanging planets for his birthday and he adores them.... and wants to add a hanging astroid belt to go with!) sigh.
We have to do deep breaths at night to calm down at bed time. We've made a game of it. Every night it's the same: Can you give me ten? Ten? I can do a hundred! But can you do ten? Of course! If I can do a hundred, I can do ten! Ok, then prove it! And he does.
Harley: "I want to make a website and call it, Healthy Food, Healty Body. There will be a kid section with foods like (soy veggie) hot dogs and green beans and an adult section with Broccoli and Eggplant. Then there will be a section for everyone with things like Pizza, Hummus and Oatmeal."
While talking about beating his dad at a card game I said, "Sounds like you kicked his butt!" Then I was informed it was a close game so I retracted my statement, and dad said, "Oh no, he kicked it!" Then Harley chimes in: "Yea, I did kick it, just not very hard." :-)
Ok, there were others that were shorter and funnier, but you know, my head is blank. I just wanted to get something down for posterity. Hope ya'll have a happy hump day!Peace,
Monday, August 1, 2011
How did we discover that the bunny had this problem, you ask? Well because Harley stepped in a pile of unsavory bunny poo which is mushy and smells gross like regular poo. He thought it was cat puke, but no no, it was the dreaded sick bunny poo. So, after I got him in the shower and cleaned his feet, I had to then clean the bunny, her very roomy cage, the rug and the hardwood floors (In two areas). Did I mention the part about how she laid in it? Yea, so it was on her tummy too.
If you are still reading, I'm sorry I didn't warn you that this was going to be a beyond distasteful post which serves no purpose other than to illustrate to anyone who is willing to listen how ridiculous life can be at times. Also, to vent. I apologize.
G'night, and may you never have to clean sick bunny poo.