Thursday, October 6, 2011

It's a wonderful life

This is the front porch, as I have no photos of the back...
Lately, I have decidedly given up the worry portion of my show.  I am enjoying my life more and trusting that the future will take care of itself.  I am working towards things, but I am not going at those things with the ball busting mind set that I've become accustomed to.  Normally, I feel like my world is a sweater which has a loose string and the string is being tugged on by something or someone.  At any moment the sweater will unravel and leave me standing there with handfuls of unstitched yarn.  When things do not move forward as I plan for them to, I become panicked, then feel guilty.  I'm not doing enough, and what I am doing is not fast enough.  Sound familiar?

Sitting on my back porch, I was admiring the view of my freshly whacked yard.  Appreciating that I can see all the way to the fence now.  Just days ago it was overgrown will stray bamboo, weeds and loads of underbrush.  Mr. Fleur decided to fix the weed whacker and get out the lawn mower.  What a difference in the feel and view of the landscape.  I was sitting on the porch just breathing it in and appreciating it.

My website is flailing, but I've decided to press on with other kinds of PR for my business and not get so hung up on the fact that I paid my 125$ for a domain name, and then proceeded to chose an interface (Wordpress) that is completely counter intuitive to me....  I am just going to work around it, till I figure out what the best next course of action is.  It goes without saying that if any of you have any ideas or suggestions, bring 'em~  I'm open that way... 

I volunteered at Harley's school today.  What a school it is!  He got to ring the bell for math class.  He and I walked the perimeter of the school (quite a large area... Harley is nothing if not thorough) ringing the bell and hollering "Math with Ms Carrie!  Math with Ms Carrie!"  Ms Carrie rocks that school.  She is the BEST and the most fun teacher of math ever!  I adore her, and so does Harley.  She calls him the mathematician.  He has his very own math folder and all of his work is kept there.  He loves having a math folder.  I love that he loves it!

Next it was on to cooking class with Mr. Louis.  He is a character.  Today's menu items included: Brown Basmati rice with veggies, and a fruit salad, which he calls Plum Delight.  The kids washed all the food and cut and chopped the pieces.  The school gets free organic food from the local coop.  The stuff that doesn't sell... I forget the name of it...  Anyway,  he goes on to explain what rice actually is and where it comes from.  Also the differences between brown and white rice....  He alone handled the flame, but every child participated and got to chop or wash.  Better than most cooking shows!  I was tempted to stay around for the eating, but I really had some things to take care of here at the house.  Harley didn't want to watch the cooking part anyway and wandered off.  

I did get a tour of the whole school, which for some reason I had not done till today.  There is a bike path, a HUGE soccer field, and a huge meeting hall, complete with stage...then there is the front field and a garden area.  Each kid gets to choose a plot of land to work in the garden... which is filled with Mexican Sunflowers.  Jan, the garden lady explains that the bees and butterflies love the flowers so much, that although they have become a tad invasive, we work around them so that the critters can have their fill.  I think that's nice.

Now, I am just enjoying the fact that I can share this with whomever wants to know, and realizing that it's ok to be a housekeeper and involved mom.  To do that kind of work and really BE THERE takes a lot of concentrated energy and dedication.  If I am not the juggling kind, that's ok.  I'll work outside of home when and as I can, and till then, we'll skate by as we do.  And we do, somehow we always do, whether I worry or not... so why bother?  I'm going to enjoy this gift as much as I can from now on.

May you enjoy your gifts also.


Ms. Moon said...

Aw. This made me happy.

Steph(anie) said...

This feels good to me too.

Love to you.

Rubye Jack said...

I just hate it when things don't go as I plan for them to, and like you I panic. That is until I realize it's okay to let go of whatever. That's so cool that the kids get there own little plot for a garden.

Have a happy day!

Akannie said...

What a great post, little flower....I love that you get to do all the mommy stuff AND all the big girl stuff too (like letting go). lol

I could just about smell that weed whacked yard....

Petit fleur said...

MMoon, Yay!

Thanks Steph.

Rubye Jack-- You would so dig this school!

Annie-Thanks for stopping. Yes, the yard is heavenly... especially now that it isn't a jungle anymore. :-)

JoJo said...

OMG, Harley's school reminds me of what Hogwarts would be like for muggles. Seriously. Cooking class for children? That's freakin BRILLIANT! And their garden plots, plus a fun math teacher? Um, can I enroll myself?

I'm glad you have let go of the worrying. I had to. sometimes i still do, of course I'm only human and it's natural. But overall, I'm so much more mellow than I have been in years and years. It feels much better.

jensandberg said...

This post feels like ease and trust unfolded in a quantum, bright way. Giving up the worry portion of your show. I love it. Also the word, "decidedly" says a lot. There is a nice kick in making decisions, isn't there? Love you.

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