We are such weenies... really we are.

I love looking at this view of the earth...  Kind of puts me right in my place.   I need that every so often as I tend to get really caught up in my own story and my own woes.  There are much bigger things brewing in the Universe than what we could even imagine in our underdeveloped beaners.  And thank heaven for that! (hee hee, I made a funny!)

This is a mandering post.  I just feel the need to communicate, but am not ready yet to sit down and tell the story of our latest adventure here at Chez Levi.  So, I'm just going to spew nuggets at ya'll and hope that it satisfies me need to report. 

I figured out a name for my coaching business, which is a huge relief!  Now I can begin the paperwork to get my business license and start making some damn money!  That's what I'm talkin about!  I wish I could tell you all what it is... not because it's so great or anything, but because I think it's rude to mention something like that, and then "leave a bitch hangin" as my dear pal SB would say.  The reason I can't is because it isn't mine yet, and since most of the names I wanted were already taken, I think it's best to leave this one under my hat till it's official.    So, this is exciting stuff for me.  In addition to embarking on a new and creative and hopefully prosperous endeavor, I am learning a lot about how I sabotage myself mentally and emotionally whenever I get close to realizing something I want.  I always suspected I did this, but now it's undeniable.  This is good because at least I know what I am dealing with, no?  It's just fascinating to stay present during my process.  It's quite a new experience for me, and I like it.  I usually barrel through life like a bull in a china shop!  Seriously.

Harley is good.  He is having doughnuts with Dad's today at his school.  Very exciting stuff!  I'm sort of proud of the fact that he doesn't really even know what a doughnut is.  He's never really even seen one before.  I'm not anti-doughnut mind you.  I like a good dunkin doughnut as much as the next guy... especially if there is dark chocolate frosting involved, but...  there is just way too much sugar in our lives today, and so the last thing I need is for my 4 year old to be begging me for a lard-ball boiled in grease and covered with confection.  I have it on good authority from a friend of mine, who used to race plastic boats in the dunkin doughnut batter mix, that this is what doughnuts are.  I believe him.  He never touched em, except to make them.  So, I'm hoping Harley has fun, while not getting himself indoctrinated into the cult of the sugary lard-ball society.  (We have enough to handle trying to keep his consumption of organic lollipops, licorice and cereal bars to a reasonable level.)  Oh, and let's not forget cookies.  No, these are not organic!

Red, my old man, has just picked up some unexpected free lance work.  That is always a blessing. So our hearts are joyful about that.

Sunday, I went to visit my best friend, nick named Little Bear (LB) at the correctional facility where he lives.  ) Please visit his blog)  We gave each other many nick names over the years, because that's what we do.  This is his Native American name.  We use them way more than our real names and now his real name seems weird to me.  I like Little Bear much better and it suits him.  He LOOKS like a little bear!  I swear it!  My NA name is Dancing Cougar, or DC.  And since I couldn't tell you the name of my business, I will throw in our porn names at no extra charge!  His is BD Winslow, and mine is Nappy Alabama. (Don't ask!)  It's just good clean fun...  no animals were harmed in the creation of these names!  So, it was great to see him.  He is still having health issues which concern me, but we had a great time catching up.  I wish there was a way to let people know, REALLY KNOW what prison is like.  I mean you hear a lot of stuff and see lots of stuff on tv, and really, you don't KNOW the half of it till you have to deal with these bastards on a real day to day level how messed up it is at its core.  And there seems to be no governing body to watchdog it, that is not some how an extension of it.  The COs (guards) get away with assault and murder, literally.   Oh, don't worry, the guards who murdered Frank Valdez, who beat him TO DEATH, they did get fired.  Damn, that's some justice, no?  Well, before I totally spiral, my point was that this goes on and on, and there aren't many who care enough, because the inmate population is largely judged to be scum, and are not even considered human by some.   Also, there are so many things in life to care about in life, why waste time with people who fucked up?  So, you see, it's hard for me to know he lives in that place.   The good new is, that besides scaring the bejesus out of me, that place FORCES me  to realize how blessed I am... SHOVES IT RIGHT IN MY FACE!  How simple human contact, freedom of movement and good food ~ just a few of the things which we all take for granted, are such blessings.  

And on that happy note, I hope you all have a lovely week.  :-p   I mean it!!  I am planning on doing the same, and counting my many MANY blessings.

Peace,

pf

Brain Rules.... again.

This week's Brain Rules post is particularly intriguing to me.  I have never doubted that the way our central nervous system responds to life and outer stimuli is largely based on our family of origin.   "They" are starting to prove this scientifically.  ("They" being scientific researchers)  ...Of course some people are born with certain predispositions to mental and physical disorder or posses disorders at birth, this is undeniable. Further, I believe that many of us are born with certain personality traits as well, however, environment has a boatload to do with improving, enhancing or turning that around when necessary.  

The end of this article says what I've intuitively known since I was a child, and is one of the primary reasons I do not believe in capital punishment.  What it says is that through experimentation and intervention, researchers are proving that parents who have better coping skills drastically effect the development of their child's sensitive nervous systems, and thereby effecting the whole way a child interacts with the world! 

The reason I'm saying this is not to make anyone feel guilty or blame themselves about  their child's weak spots.  I am more concerned with those affected by severe abuse, and who do not get the treatment they need... and societies way of "dealing with them".  My point is that society often scoffs at those of us defending men and women on death row when we try to prove that their abusive upbringings are indeed mitigating circumstances. That that information is directly connected to their state of mind at the time of the crime, the direction of their growth  (or lack of) in all ways...  It DOES matter.  And furthermore most of these men need to be in mental health facilities, not further punished for everyone failing them.

That's all.

Jailhouse Blog

We went to see our friends JJ and LB at the prison a few weekends ago. It was an adventure as always. We arrived a little later than we had hoped. Since getting the count right has been a persistent problem for the better part of this year, I was hoping we'd get there well before midday, but we just skated in around 11:30 or so. Of course the usual delays... since our son isn't a toddler anymore, they needed a new updated photo of him. Then there were the other usual issues. (my husband wasn't in the system.) For some strange reason, JJ always has issues with regard to our visitations. Either the brass insist that we have the wrong visiting day, or they can't find my husband on his roster, and this time they couldn't even find him in the system period! So when I was certain that My husband, Frank, was not going to get himself ejected by going into some sort of condescending tirade with the natives.... I left him to deal with his issue while Harley and I trekked on through search and the long walk to DR dorm trying our best to beat the count. And we did! I can't say as much for Frank. It took him about 45 minutes to get things straight, and the count did get messed up. ugh! But, we were all happy that no tirades were launched & everyone was where they should be. Everyone except JJ that is.

JJ finally made it out, but not before Frank almost got himself ejected yet AGAIN! You see, one of "the rules" is that you are not supposed to converse with any other inmate except the one you are there to see. ( Frank is on JJ's list, and I am on LBs list.) While Frank was waiting for JJ, he saw a few other friends milling about, so of course he saunters over giving them big hugs and chatting away as though he was at a baseball game. Frank is not a quiet man, so I'm sure the BMIC probably thought that he was not only breaking the rules, but being flagrant about it... hurling it in his authoritative face.... so he spoke with Frank, explaining the rule in a very civilized manner and asking him to keep to his table. Ok, so Frank then sits down (he is at the very next table to me Harley and LB) and he begins to ask LB who he likes in the Superbowl and they are talking about the season and the strategies of different teams and what teams deserved what, and etc... so BMIC can't believe the nerve of Frank! After he had just spoken to him and EXPLAINED the rule. (I am rolling my eyes by this point) So, now BMIC takes Frank for a little walk and they talk about the three strike principle and that now Frank is on his 2nd strike, "you get me?" Ok, so now Frank decides the only way to keep his yapper from yapping is to get a deck of cards and play some solitaire. That seemed to work. Whew!

I wanted to place a video here.... I have technical difficulties so all I could manage if you want to check out Elvis, click here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1Qo1eaWF8c

Finally, JJ made it out and everyone was behaving like ladies and gentlemen. LB, Harley and I were busily playing dominoes. Building structures and snake like creatures and knocking them down. This is particularly fun when you are three! Then we lunched on our traditional Big Ass Chicken sandwich and LB had his usual sausage/egg croissant and we all shared the beloved honey mustard pretzel chips. Ahh a feast for all. Harley shared with me. (When they say Big Ass... they are not kidding.) So after lunch, Harley switched tables to sit with dad and JJ.

JJ and Harley have a special relationship. They draw pictures for each other (JJ is an amazing artist) and they like to play dominoes. Frank is no gamer slouch. In fact, he is one of the best gamers I know, but he actually was sitting out, letting ole JJ and Harley battle it out in a rousing game of high card. (Apparently, Frank was not getting any high cards and was getting bored!) So, the game is whoever gets the high card wins the pot (of dominoes). So that kept them all quite entertained. That and ice cream... and popcorn!

While they were male bonding, LB and I were busy catching up on more grown up topics. Not the least of which, blogging. If you did not read my first blog post, it was about LB and our New Years visit. I mentioned that there was a whole lot that I cannot blog about with regard to him for security reasons. I did however, pitch to him the idea of starting his own blog.... and much to my surprise he went for it! I'm really excited about this! I'm happy to be able to help give his voice an avenue for expression and happy that he has decided to take this opportunity. The name of the Blog will be "Life in Xanadu". Since he has no computer access, we have to do everything via snail mail. So while he is most interested in receiving and responding to comments, it will likely take a few weeks to get those responses... So please be patient.

I don't know what direction his blog with take, but I'm sure it will be fascinating.
Hope everyone drops by.
PF